How Preemie Moms are Chosen - Erma Bombeck

One of My fellow PPROM moms posted this, and I thought it was fantastic, so I wanted to share it.

Did you ever wonder how the mothers of premature babies are chosen?

Somehow, I visualize God hovering Earth, selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth, son. Patron Saint...give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a preemie."

The angel is curious. "Why this one God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a premature baby a mother who knows no laughter? That would be cruel."

"But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair.
Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it.

I watched her today. She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I am going to give her has a world of it's own. She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."

God smiles. "This one is perfect. She has just the right amount of selfishness. "
The angel gasps, "Selfishness! Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive. Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect. She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.

She will never take for granted a spoken word. She will never consider a step ordinary. When her child says "momma" for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.

I will permit her to see clear the things that I see - ignorance, cruelty, prejudice - and allow her to rise above them.

She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"But what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air. God smiles.

"A mirror will suffice.

24 weeks old Already!!

Holy, It has sure been a long time since I have written on my blog.   Crazy how time passes.

Well Connor was 24 weeks old on Saturday (if you count week by week).  6 MONTHS, its crazy.  He has finally been home now for almost the same amount of time he spent in the NICU.   If you would have asked me back in July, if I thought we would be here now.  I would not have had an answer.

Connor is now 15 lbs, 3 oz as of last Thursday!!  Our big boy is growing like a weed.  He is overall healthy, but still working on his lungs.  Just giving them more time to develop and repair.  And apparently that could take up to 2+ years.   So I am trying to be patient. 

But, Overall things are really good.  It is so nice to be home and settled now and enjoying out little man.  Watching him work on developing new skills everyday.  It is just amazing.

For once, it is nice to say that I actually dont have much more to report right now. 

day by day, week by week, baby steps!

Update

WOW!  It has been awhile since i have updated my blog.   Things have been super busy.

So following my last update there have been some major milestones that have happened.

On September 27, 2010, Connor came off all breathing support and remained off of it. 

Shortly after my last post I found another inguinal hernia in Connor.  This time on the right side.  The surgeon had told us it could happen, but we were hoping it would not.  So needless to say on Oct 5, 2010 Connor underwent another surgery for his right inguinal hernia.  PLus they repaired his umbilical hernia as they said it was mostly incisional due to his last surgery.   This meant another transfer back to the stollery.

On Oct 8, 2010 we were transferred back to the Grey Nuns hospital.  The nurses all welcomed connor back with open arms and made him a welcome back poster.  Super cute!!

Connor continued to heal from his surgery.

On Oct 10, 2010 just in time for Thanksgiving, Connor's feeding tube came out!!!!  So exciting and he was able to continue to feed on his own.

Connor has continued to gain wait and grow.   He still has some trouble with breathing, mostly just needing to work a little harder then most babies to breath.  But they tell us this will all come together in time as the lungs continue to develop.

On Oct 14, 2010 our little bean had to pass his car seat test in order to come home.  He had to last 90 minutes in a car seat with out more then 2 incidents on the monitors.  Unfortunatly, he did not pass this test.

However, on October 15, 2010he got to try again and passed!!!

Meaning....... WE GOT TO BEING CONNOR HOME ON OCTOBER 15, 2010!!!!

We are so excited to have our little man home. 

day by day , week by week, baby steps.

Update over past couple weeks.

So just wanted to give an update on how things have been going for us lately, as it has been awhile.

So following Connor's emergency hernia surgery and PDA surgery we were moved to a hospital closer to home.  Which has been so nice.

Things have slowed down some for us, as far as stress.  Which has also been very nice.
For the first week we were at the new hospital, Connor was still on CPAP and requiring fluctuations in oxygen.   We then discovered that he was getting an infection in his PDA incision.  :(   Thankfully we caught it right away and got antibiotics on board and it is healing nicely now.

They also tried to switch him from fentynol to morphine near the end of his weening process as aparently the morphine is easier on the system.  Well Connor does not do so well with Morphine and had apneas from it.  So he was bumped up onto Biphais (bipap).

They then decided that they were having to hold so many morphine doses that they would just stop them all together.  Well he then went through withdrawls for the past 3 days.  Very irritable and unsettled.  But was not scoring high enough on the withdrawl score sheet for them to reintroduce morphine to him.    SO he coasted by!!

Thankfully today he is much better!

Also, when I got back to the hospital last night following dinner, I walked in to find him on no breathing support what so ever.   I was shocked.  The RT decided that cause he was on room air on the biphasic/cpap that he was not requiring the extra O2, so they wanted to see if he could handle everything on his own. The doc only let him trial for 3 hours and he did AMAZING!!  No desats or increased work of breathing.

So today on rounds they decided they would let him try 3 hours again.  If tolerated then he could keep going.   Well he is still on Room Air as of 11 pm tonight and he started at noon today.   So happy for our little guys.

BUT....... I started noticing yesterday that his belly button was all of a sudden protruding more then normal.   SO looks like potential umbilical hernia now!!  BUGGER...... will it ever end?

But apparently the treatment is to do nothing as they tend to go away on there own.  I will discuss all this tomorrow during rounds of course. 

So now if he can remain off the CPAP for a few days with no issues they are going to let him try feeding on his own.  I am hoping that this will be the one thing that goes smoothly for us!!

day by day, week by week, baby steps!

Off the CPAP

Yesterday I returned to the hospital after dinner to find Connor off all breathing support.  I was very surprised. 

The respiratory therapist felt that he should try it as he was not requiring additional oxygen on the CPAP.  So the doc let him go for 3 hours only.   He lasted the whole 3 hours and did amazing!!

Then today during rounds it was discussed and the doctor stated he could try another 3 hours off all breathing support.  If he was doing well, then he could continue as tolerated.

He was taken off CPAP at noon today, and when I left the hospital tonight at 9 pm, he was still breathing room air and doing well. 

YAY for Connor!!

Though there is potential he may get a little tired and need some breathing support temporarily, or possibly just at night.  But he is still doing an amazing job, we are so excited!!!

If he can remain off CPAP for a few days, they will allow him to try eating on his own.  Which just means one step closer to going home!!

On a not so great note - it looks like Connor may now have an umbilical hernia (which is common in babies).  GREAT!  However, the treatment is apparently nothing.   They just generally resolve on their own and do not require surgery. 

So lets hope we do not hit the 1 - 3% of it not resolving on its own.  I will attach a picture which shows his poor belly button distended. 

Poor boy!

day by day, week by week, baby steps!

Testing out Low flow

Today has been a big day for Connnor.  He was able to try out some low flow oxygen, and get off the CPAP for a few hours.  He did pretty well and his stats remained fairly good as well.  But after a little while he was getting a bit tired from the new change and having to work a little harder to breath.  So he went back on to the CPAP.  But it was a great first trial run. 

I was able to get some good pictures with him without having the CPAP on his poor little face!! 

He is coming along.  He is also 34 weeks gestational age today as well.  So we still have 6 more weeks to go till his original due date.  Still lots more developing to be done for his little lungs. 

Connor also had his first big boy bath last night.  Apparently, he decided to pee all over his bed, while his nurse was changing him.  So 3 nurses and a respiratory therapist later, they decided they would give him a real bath.  The nurse took some cute pictures for us and hung them up in his room. 

He also reached 5 lbs today!! 

So not much more then that to report today, which is nice for a change!!

day by day, week by week, baby steps!

Update - and the big move closer to home

Connor is now 4 days post PDA surgery and is recovering well.  They are weening him down on his pain medications and increasing his feeds.

He also decided yesterday morning that he was not going to wait for the docs to ween him off his ventilator but rather he would take care of that himself.  So yesterday morning at 5 am,  he pulled his own ventilation tube out.   The nurse only figured it out cause they could hear him crying from his isolate. 

He is now on CPAP and is doing fairly well considering everything.   So they will now work on weening him down on the CPAP requirements. 

Our other big news of the day is that they were able to transfer him to the Grey Nuns by our place.  We are so excited to have him much closer to home.  As well as know that it is a step closer to him making is way home to us. 

He is all settled in well there now and the NICU is new in the last couple years.  So it is quite the Hilton of NICU's.  You have your own more private room, with lots more space.

We are now hoping that Connor will have the chance to make some strides forward without having to fight against his open PDA.

As well on the bowel front, he had a big poop tonight!!  Which is a great sign that his bowels are beginning to kick into full gear following his hernia/bowel surgery.

day by day, week by week, baby steps!